Washington Lebo'Skins

Sometimes there's a blog post -- I won't say a hero, 'cause what's a hero -- but sometimes there's a blog post, well, shoot, I done introduced the post comparing the SEC football teams to Simpsons characters enough.

Being as lazy as the Dude, I've decided to kidnap myself; myself, in this case, being the aforementioned post; SEC football teams being the Washington Redskins players; and Simpsons characters being, of course, Lebowski folk.

The Skins lineup is in our hands, Dude...

Dan Snyder = The Big Lebowski
Pretty much every season, the goddamn plane crashes into the mountain. And who does The Danny blame? The bums, of course. Some Chinaman took a GM from him in Korea. But he went out and achieved anyway. And he cannot solve that problem of you not being able to see because of your obstructed-view seat, only you can.












Vinny Cerrato = Brandt
We had not considered that we overspent for Archuleta, Dude.











Joe Gibbs = The Stranger
See how the "R" on his hat kinda curls up at the sides, like The Stranger's mustache? That's not a coincidence. Coach Joe is infinitely wise and often appears dead on the sideline. And who would really be surprised if, mid-third quarter, he turned to his left and said, "I dig your style, Buges, but do you have to use so many darn cuss words?"









Clinton Portis = The Dude
C.P., or Dollar Dollar Bill if you're not into the whole brevity thing, is as carefree as the Dude. No doubt he spent many summers at The U holding a beer in one hand and a joint in the other while crashing his car into a tree.













Jon Jansen = Walter Sobchak
We know from the stories of him hunting with Brunell and Ramsey that he shoots things, including perhaps Nihilists. And a man that size, well, he's got to have some dirty undies. Just look at these pictures. Jesus. (I said it, man.) Speaking of Jesus...









Marcus Washington = Jesus Quintana
A Marcus Washington tackle celebration is every bit as elaborate as the Jesus' strike dance. One might even say that Marcus jumps around like, dare i say it, an 8-year-old, Dude.

More to come, including Ade Jimoh as, yes, Smokey. (This is not Special Teams, this is bowling. There are rules.)